Just before going offline to write today's update, I ran
into a fellow double-x on one the free for all game servers I
frequent. I would give her quake name, but that would only add
to the list of crimes it appears that I`ve committed against
her. However, rcon and status being the two
wonderful words they are, and with ip tracers being so readily
available these days, I can knowingly refer to her as Claire.
It appears that in Claire`s little world, ladies such as
Kornelia, KillCreek, Leann and myself are making life
difficult for women online by "flaunting our gender."
"Flaunting our gender" ???
Kornelia spends her time regularly kicking ass at the
Planet Quake Beatdown. KillCreek rose to fame, amongst
other things, for beating John Romero at his own game. Leann
has put together one of the most informative and helpful
female-orientated Quake resources on the internet, the
Quake Woman`s Forum,
and I write this column and sit ops on #Quake2.uk.
Claire, wtf are you on? How could any of this hurt women
online? Why should I hide what I am? And how does telling
people that I`m female, or using this column to put the female
perspective across make life anymore difficult for you or any
other female Quaker? And if you`ve such a problem with people
knowing your gender, why did you announce to me that you were
xx on a public server?
If being a woman is such a crime Claire, I suggest you have
a sex change. From your attitude this afternoon it appears
you`ve the testosterone for it already…
I thought with the influx of lpb`s we've recently
experienced, provoking
Savage CTF to
up it's lpb limit to half the fielded match team, I'd write a
few words on what it is to "go lpb." My experience you see,
wasn't quite as straight forward as I thought it would be.
Before you find yourself expecting to hear a similar horror
story to the one on Durz`s
column, my contact with said telecommunications company
was actually completely stress free, so it's either Durz`s bad
luck or me being fluky again. J
But either way, this isn't so much about having an LPB
connection installed, more about what you have to live up to
after and whether or not you and your machine are cut out for
it.
My first problem, which became obvious very quickly, was
that my machine at the time wasn`t up to running such as fast
connection. Silly as it may sound, I`d never really connected
the two ideas that a) most lpb`s were lpbs because they
were extremely rich and could afford the connection costs, and
b) for that very same reason, had particularly
beef-cake machines to play on. Hence when I fired up my
vanilla 233MMX in it`s old Vx board I found myself not
actually doing very well. 90% of my game being based around
what were shit hot railing skills, long perfected after having
fellow clannie [UNR]Yakumo
rail me into the back wall of Zorak`s so many times, I found I
had no idea where now to aim, and lost nine tenths of my
gaming tactics, leaving me to rl and ss my way around. The
problem I hadn`t expected before was that running at my brand
new rate of 7K/Sec, my machine really wasn`t powerful enough
to display all that data, and the 30fps I was capped at only
allowed me to see more of the fire fight that killed me.
J So although I technically
pinged much lower than before, because my machine was
struggling so much to display all the new data I found myself
doing worse than before, getting beaten to the trigger almost
every time.
Well, I say every time, but that introduces the second
problem. You see, although they`re still there, you don`t
really noticed the hpb`s anymore, unless you`re in the middle
of Ra2 pickup or CTF or very busy deathmatch, cos anyone with
a 233 is gonna struggle then. It`s the lpb`s you notice,
because you feel you are one and should be on the level with
them. It should be you at the top of the pickup score board
with your 40 frags and similarly sized ping. And it`s only
when you go through this you realise machine spec is as much
of being an lpb as the actual digital line is, because you
find that as hard as you might try, that old Vx and can`t push
your 233 fast enough, which can`t push your V2 fast enough to
get the results you`d have seen (UNR)Tasan or [King]Bose or
[!]Flex producing before.
So what now. Well this is the tricky part. Cos you`ve just
spent X amount on the new line and you suddenly find yourself
strapped for cash, but wanting to correct what you feel are
personal inadequacies…
My solution actually appears to be the most popular, tho
the AMD/3Dnow combo is apparently just as deadly.
Rip out all your old cards and splash £400 odd (hopefully
leaving you enough for that first phone bill) on a new case if
you need one to house ATX, a nice new Bx board, Abit`s BH6
being a blinder for the price, PC100 Ram and a Celeron 300a
you can over clock quite happily to 450 out of the box.
Combine that with crafty use of PS2Rate or a nice new USB
mouse to go with your nice new USB port, you find yourself
suddenly hitting fraglimits every other Ra2 game and clearing
up even on Minos… The trick is, to cap at the 60fps your lpb
connection allows you too, and having the machine to push it
to that like your old 233 did the 30 you capped on as a
modemer… Quake 2 it appears, is a game of fps as much as it is
a game of skill, timing and practise…
The other solution of course, is to play QuakeWorld.
J
I usually spend my two days off, Sunday and Monday, some
where between bed, resting up after a grueling week in the
clubs, or infront of my puter, catching up on a week's goss,
chatting with my friends and fragging peak time lamers on the
BarrysWorld servers. This morning however, the very sight of
my puter made me want to spew. (Although the mere 3 hours
sleep I had was more likely the cause...
J) Enough, I decided was enough,
and off I went to convince Chris to bunk the afternoon off
work and drive us both to visit his parents at their Falconry
Centre.
What has this gotta do with BarrysWorld I hear you ask?
Well, nothing really, but seeing the hunting hawks, fresh from
their summer moult, soaring through the air reminded me that
there is life beyond computers and that Quake 2 is very much
just a game. So if you`re like the punter I spoke to on
#Quake2.uk yesterday who spends his time playing EraserBots
with the lag variable set during peak time cos he can't afford
the phone bill and wants to hone his skillz like the l33t
quaker d00d he is, I suggest you turn your machine off right
now and go find a damn pub!!! J
Thanks go out to all the Anime anoraks that mailed to point
out that the character depicted on Ivy`s webpage has actually
been around and famous much longer than she has, but that
still doesn't change the fact that she found it long
before me. J So I
repeat my humble request for anime types with time to kill to
drop me a line… (Cmon, what can be more enjoyable that wasting
a few hours away painting something as beautiful as me?
J)
Shout out to DBs for uploading said piccy onto the web
server. Hopefully I`ll resist the urge to go all arty cos if I
do I think I`ll be linking to my own webspace.
J Also, quick mention to Durz
for the gracious comment on his column yesterday.
I hear unconfirmed rumours that RSC are pulling out of CTF…
Um… doh.
Commiserations, you guys rocked. Ra2 league perhaps
instead?
Final shout, this time to [UNR]Yakumo for follwoing my
advice and taking the weekend off from clan matches. As I`m
sure the rest of [UNR], and for that matter, the rest of
UKCCL will agree, (and
prolly only cos he appears so high in the "you were killed by"
section of their GibStats so often) dedicated doesn't
even begin to describe it. Enjoy the rest hon, you've earned
it.
Thought for the Day:
Who Cares A Lot? J
